In the summer of 2022, Heather and I began a tradition of creating art together every Friday. Over the following months, we explored a variety of projects—from painting and pottery to crafting door wreaths and even making a stained-glass mirror. As time passed, however, it became clear that I needed to simplify our activities. Heather increasingly struggled with multi-step projects and fine motor tasks.
The two attached images highlight the striking decline in Heather’s ability to engage in art. The first, a flower painting, was created in the autumn of 2022, while the second, completed in January 2025, reflects a marked change over just two and a half years.
Some days Heather refuses to engage with any art materials, and then there are other days when she will make a few marks on paper, especially if I place a marker in her hand and gently guide her movements.
I am so grateful for the many positive art-making experiences we’ve shared over the past few years. It became a special way for us to connect without words, bringing us both joy through our shared creative activities.
That is a most revealing and devastating depiction of how the brain functions as the dementia progresses. Wow. I also am a retired teacher who spends a lot of time with my sister who was diagnosed in July of 2022 with Early Onset Alzheimer’s. I have tried to engage her in art projects, flower arranging, etc. but there is very little understanding, focus or desire to do much. It doesn’t mean that she hasn’t enjoyed the time together. I love the idea of your book and I’d like to purchase it for the Assisted Living/Memory Care facility where my sister will be going into next month. Thanks for adding to the conversation. It is sorely needed.
Thank you Alison for your kind and supportive comment. My art making experience with Heather has changed so drastically over the past 3 years. Now, much like your situation, Heather shows no interest in making art, but I continue to sit beside her and play with art supplies while she watches. There are so few valuable ways of connecting and I find this one is valuable to me and I hope to her as well.
A message to Hetty and Allison: Another retired elementary school teacher here in Iowa, USA! Starting this journey,
Blessed that assisted living is not needed yet, but has me thinking… I think music will be my final approach to engage my husband ….
I think finding this site and John’s site has been “God planned” for me- how else could I have found you all?!?
Hello Kathy.
Music will certainly enrich the rocky road that lies ahead for you and your husband.
I have been offering art workshops to the Adult Day program that Heather used to attend. The participants are involved at different levels of cognitive understanding but the overriding connection is that they all enjoy the time they spend making art together. There is no judgement and lots of encouragement among the group.
Heather lost her ability to communicate verbally more than a year ago. This made it more and more difficult for us to make art together. However, I did keep trying until very recently.
I wish you all the very best and I know that your teaching experience will serve you well. When I am planning art workshops I think back to my years of teaching young children and apply the what I learned through this experience.
Sending you very warm wishes from Halifax
Hetty
Wow. A picture says a thousand words. Thanks for sharing.